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We'll Always Have Paris
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Aug 29 - Retro Review: Hero Worship
A young boy who is the sole survivor of a disaster that killed his parents decides to emulate Data.

Aug 21 - Retro Review: New Ground
Worf's human mother brings his son Alexander on board, insisting that she can no longer raise the boy.

Aug 14 - Retro Review: A Matter of Time
When a visitor from a future era arrives on the ship, Picard asks for assistance about how to save a dying planet.

July 31 - Retro Review: Unification, Part Two
Picard learns the reason for Spock's visit to Romulus: an attempted reunification of the Vulcan and Romulan races.

July 17 - Retro Review: Unification, Part One
Shocked to learn that Spock may have defected to the Romulans, Picard and Data cross the Neutral Zone in to find him.

July 10 - Retro Review: The Game
When an interactive game becomes addictive to the crew, Wesley Crusher and his new girlfriend must save the day.

June 20 - Retro Review: Disaster
Troi must take command of the ship while Picard struggles to work with three children and Worf delivers Keiko's baby.

June 6 - Retro Review: Silicon Avatar
A scientist pursuing the Crystalline Entity discovers that Data's brain holds her son's memories.

May 30 - Retro Review: Ensign Ro
A court-martialed Starfleet officer from occupied Bajor is sent to help locate a terrorist leader.

May 23 - Retro Review: Darmok
Picard is exiled with the leader of an alien race who speaks in incomprehensible metaphors.

May 15 - Retro Review: Redemption, Part Two
Picard discovers that Tasha Yar's Romulan daughter is influencing the Klingon civil war.

May 9 - Retro Review: Redemption, Part One
When Picard is asked as Arbiter of Succession to oversee Gowron's installation, Worf resigns from Starfleet to fight against the Duras family.

May 2 - Retro Review: In Theory
Data creates a romantic subroutine to experiment with love.

Apr 24 - Retro Review: The Mind's Eye
LaForge is kidnapped and altered by Romulans to take part in an assassination plot against a Klingon governor.

 
By KJP
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 5:11 PM GMT

See Also: 'We'll Always Have Paris' Episode Guide

Nameless Lieutenant: Touché!
Picard: Ow! Just for that I won't tell you your name!
Nameless Lieutenant: Aw, have a heart, sir! Can we try that again?
(tape-recorder fweeeeeeep)
Picard: Ow! Just for that I won't tell you your name!
Nameless Lieutenant: That wasn't quite what I meant.

Picard: Data, what just happened?
Data: Cause unknown, sir. Effects are also unknown.
Picard: Mr. Data, I need android analysis, not Betazoid bafflement.

Troi: Sir, you seem to have more issues regarding Dr. Manheim than you're letting on.
Picard: Did your empathic abilities tune you into that?
Troi: That, and the way you knocked the arm off your captain's chair with a rolled-up towel.

Picard: Ah, the Holodeck. No better place to be when there's time warps and spatial anomalies about.
Holo-Waiter: Bonjour, monsieur. Your first time in Paris?
Picard: What, don't you recognize a French accent when you hear it?

Riker: Captain, are the rumors of Dr. Manheim's mental instability true?
La Forge: Arriving at coordinates, and receiving a new message: "Set course for the second star to the right, and straight on till morning."
Picard: No, Number One, not that I'm aware of.

La Forge: Arriving at Dr. Manheim's lab.
Female Voice: Who's there?
Picard: This is the captain of the Enterprise, but definitely not the man who stood you up in a Paris café years ago.
Female Voice: Oh, hi, Jean-Luc.
Picard: Crap.

Jenice Manheim: *smooch*
Picard: You always loved to end long expositional conversations that way.
Crusher: It's only the first season -- should I be jealous yet?
Picard: Nothing is outside the realm of the P/C 'shippers.

Picard: It's us, from fifteen seconds ago!
Picard 2: It's us, from fifteen seconds from now!
Picard: Hmm. I think I'm starting to see what the problem is here....

Data: What we have just witnessed is the Manheim Effect, wherein events regularly repeat themselves.
Riker: So what?
Data: In theory, this could allow us to achieve a full hour episode from only half an hour of story.
Riker: Big deal. We're doing that now by padding it with the captain's love scenes.

Crusher: Dr. Manheim is awake, but not fully aware.
Dr. Manheim: My mind feels like it is floating between two places.
Crusher: He seems to be suffering from an overdose of New Age music.

Picard: We need your help to fix things.
Dr. Manheim: Impossible. To even understand it would require someone who speaks native technobabble.
Data: You called?

Picard: I called this meeting so we can fret over what will happen to the timescape if we fail.
Jenice: May I pull you away for a dull private conversation?
Picard: Sure, why not. After all, we have to justify this episode's title somehow.
Jenice: And here I thought it would involve some misfit Maquis lieutenant.

Picard: Now remember, Mr. Data, when fixing a time anomaly, you have to have an appropriate "time" catch phrase to use at the crucial moment.
Data: Okay, how about... "Time to take out the trash"?
Picard: Ugh. I would think any Starfleet officer could come up with something better than THAT.

Data: Okay, I have dodged the security lasers, evaded the fluorescent bulbs of doom, and now...
Time Distortion: WHOOSH
Data 1: Uh oh, there are three of me now. Hmm....
Data 3: Helloooooooooooooo....
Data 2: ......Hellooooooooooo....
Data 1: ............Helloooooooo....
All Three Datas: Hello.
Data 3: I always wanted to do that.

Data: Time to pour the antimatter.
Time Distortion: What, THAT'S your catch phrase?
Data: No, it is what I am doing. Catch phrases are overrated.
Time Distortion: GAK!

Picard: Before we say farewell and you return to your husband, may I ask what you think of our Holodeck's re-creation of the French café?
Jenice: Very authentic. I haven't seen our waiter in over an hour.

Picard: Set a course, Mr. La Forge. What are you staring at, Number One?
Riker: Oh, nothing, just wondering how I would have handled the situation of dealing with the attractive wife of an eccentric scientist on a remote space station.
Picard: Right, as if that could ever happen again. Engage!
(The Enterprise sails off at Ludicrous Speed)

THE END

Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.


KJP is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.

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